The 1980s were truly a great time to be a kid.
1.
The confusion over there being two cartoons called Ghostbusters:
Columbia Pictures / ©Columbia Pictures/Courtesy Everett Collection, Filmation Associates / Filmation Associates/courtesy Everett Collection
2.
The jingle for My Buddy and Kid Sister:
3.
And the “…and growing” part of the jingle for Flintstones Vitamins:
4.
That you can’t think about Family Ties without hearing “Sha-la-la-la” in your head:
5.
The absolute disappointment you felt anytime you made shaved ice with the Snoopy Sno Cone Maker and only ended up with a slushy mess:
6.
The absolute struggle it was to get your Popple back into its ball shape:
7.
The absolute joy you got watching Muppet Babies (even if it was just a rerun):
Hensonassociates / ©HensonAssociates/Courtesy Everett Collection
9.
Yet always wondering what the hell Nanny looked like:
10.
How the illustrations from Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark were actually more frighting than the stories:
11.
That every kid owned these rainbow flip-flops — that were also super painful, since the nylon on the straps would rub against your toes:
12.
Just how uncomfortable it was to see out of and walk in these costumes — but you wanted one, no matter what:
13.
How cars came with metal ashtrays on the door and you were always compelled to play with it (by opening and shutting it fast) whenever you sat next to one:
14.
And how they also came with metal seat buckles and you had a 90% chance of burning yourself with it on a hot day:
15.
Wanting a Clapper because of the commercial (truly the smarthome appliance of its time):
16.
The F.H.E. logo that appeared before a whole bunch of your favorite VHS tapes:
17.
That nobody could convince you that Kenner’s Family Tree House wasn’t part of the Fisher-Price’s Little People collection:
18.
How you knew better than to remove the stickers from your Garbage Pail Kids cards:
19.
How everyone’s grandma owned this one Fisher-Price play set:
20.
How you would hold the gun directly in front of the TV screen whenever you played Duck Hunt:
21.
The sheer stress of ripping off the sides of dot matrix paper:
22.
That just looking at the cover of a Mead Académie Sketch Pad inspired you to want to draw:
23.
How you knew when exactly to close your eyes during the “Large Marge” scene in Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure:
24.
And how you would immediately switch the channel whenever Time Life’s creepy AF Mysteries of the Unknown commercial came on:
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25.
Just how much more satisfying it was to drink out of Welch’s jelly jar glasses:
26.
That there was no worse TV commercial character than the bitchy Tootsie Roll Pop owl:
27.
That the Officer Big Mac climb-in jail at McDonald’s always smelled like feet:
I know the 1980s were a crazy time, but I refuse to believe “Officer Big Mac” was real even though I witnessed his tenure of horror first hand.
Twitter: @redroomrantings
28.
That these cups at Pizza Hut always left a little lingering plasticky flavor to whatever you were drinking:
29.
That watching Square One was primarily just for “Mathnet”:
30.
The smell of Hawaiian pizza — ’cause it was served at EVERY birthday party 😔:
31.
That even though they were brother and sister, you still shipped He-Man and She-Ra:
Group W/ Everett Collection
32.
The fact that you at least once put your fingers together like Evie on Out of This World to see if you could freeze time:
33.
That there was no such thing as owning too many Smurf PVC figures:
34.
Just how dangerous it was to go down a hill in Roller Racers:
35.
And how you had to be careful not to wreck your ankle while jumping on a Pogo Ball:
36.
That it wasn’t a trip to Burger King until you got your crown:
37.
How Disney’s The Black Cauldron…
38.
…and Return to Oz were true horror movies:
39.
How you would save the plastic baskets strawberries came in so you could make Easter baskets in school:
40.
The spoon trick you would use to open Quik (that came in a metal tin):
41.
That the characters from the Sweet Pickles books were all messy and just a bit too relatable:
42.
That there will always be three Cinnamon Toast Crunch bakers:
43.
That 75% of the fun of playing with Colorforms was sniffing them:
44.
That you believed the urban legend that there was a ghost boy in Three Men and a Baby:
45.
The logo for DIC with the kid’s voice that pronounced it “Deeek”:
46.
How heavy these flashlights were because of the ton of huge batteries inside of them:
47.
How you were always careful not to scratch your scratch ‘n’ sniff stickers too much, so you wouldn’t waste the smell:
48.
The fact that you found Alf both funny and completely terrifying:
Alien Productions / Alien Productions / Courtesy: Everett Collection
50.
And lastly, how 35 years later, you’re still traumatized by that episode of Punky Brewster where Cherie almost died after being locked in the abandoned fridge: