If only we could all think of comebacks like these.
3.
This comeback that invalidated any complaint about the Cleveland Indians changing their names to the Guardians:
Twitter: @ShawnHils
4.
This daughter’s reply that left her dad in a pile of ashes on the floor:
my daughter was wearing a flannel hoodie so I said “hey, the 90’s called” and she replied “yeah cause they couldn’t text” and godDAMMIT I’m getting really tired of my kids owning me
Twitter: @GrantTanaka
5.
This comeback that served facts and a scalding burn to the costar of a sitcom that went off the air in 1993:
Actually, teen pregnancy & abortion peaked in the 90s, just like Kirstie Alley. https://t.co/doLBuMAH3h
Twitter: @MamaDoctorJones
9.
This comeback we should all save for future usage:
Was wearing a mask while pumping gas today and a 30’s something guy pulled up behind me, got out and said “Fucking Sheep”.
To which I replied “Is that what you were doing before you got here?”
😂🤣😷
Twitter: @crwequine
10.
This comeback that basically won Scarlett Johansson’s lawsuit against Disney for her:
Disney/Marvel/ Twitter: @DanWilbur
11.
This delightfully sarcastic comeback that’ll make you go, “The power!”:
One of my favorite things about pride month is celebrating the many achievements of the LGBTQ community, like when we collectively stole the rainbow from God https://t.co/qUz1zfFJli
Twitter: @ChrisDStedman
23.
This comeback from an old woman with no F’s to give:
male cashier cracked a joke & followed with “you should smile more” & before i could say anything the older african american woman behind me goes “PFFT hunny contrary to popular belief you don’t gotta smile for a fucking clown” & i hope her life has nothing but happiness & peace
Twitter: @sp0okygorl
26.
Patton Oswalt’s comeback skewering this ridiculous NRA tweet:
Kinda wish so many freedom seeds weren’t flying out of anger pipes into people’s thinky coconuts and organ barrels and making their loved ones leak so much boo-hoo water out of their peep orbs. https://t.co/WAbcXnuihr
Twitter: @pattonoswalt
28.
This comeback that’s hilariously honest and on point:
when guys are like “i’m not gonna be able to cum with a condom on” it’s like, ok, cool. sorry to hear that. i’m probably not gonna be able to cum at all, so i guess we’ll get through this together.
Twitter: @danadonnelly
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